imabitch

It hurts;
Giving up AND
Saying goodbye.

BUT, even if i dont do it NOW.
I still have to do it LATER.

THANKS for all the LOVE and SUPPORT
you'll have given to me, SHAKEIT,
PINKY, PARTNER, PRESTY, DOTT,
DONN, ALLY, NAT, LIZZY, EVAN,
JASPER and anyone i've missed out.

I will never forget you'll.
BUT, I just feel i have to
start accepting the fact
that its NO longer the same
anymore.

And it never will be.

It hurts.
Real bad.
But i have to do this.
Sorry shakeit.

But i'll still be here for you'll as promised.
My one most wish i've been hoping for is,
seriously, talking to you again.
Even a HI or a BYE is good enough.
Another two months til all of you'll
are gone.

Its been almost seven months since
we last spoken. But its just so
HARD. Mistunderstandings after
misunderstandings.

Piling up one after another.
We never cleared them.
It dragged on for months.
How much longer is it gonna drag for?

I hope you do realise
that I treat you as
a friend, nothing more
to that. SERIOUSLY.
You may NOT belief
me but its the truth.

As for the band;
I'M SORRY FOR THE TROUBLES CAUSED.
I'm sorry i keep forgetting to bring it.
It was definitely NOT deliberate.
Think whatever you want.

Anyways.
I know.
Theres just noway we'll be
talking again. And i also
dont wanna try anymore.
Yes you hate me,
BUT I DONT.

I still regard you as my DOTT.
For that, i am certain.

I havent even beeen to your
blog for such a fucking long time.
Cos whatever you say about me.
FUCKING HURTS.

Its far from what i imagined.

Tears while typing this entry.
I just feel so FUCKED UP.
In school, at home,
EVERYWHERE.

It hurts so bad.
SO BAD.

Holding onto the hurt
i felt ever since
i got back my end
year results last year.

Noone understands.
Noone will understand.
Unless they go through it.
Unless they go through it.

I feel so LOST.
I need direction.
I dont wanna try nomore.
I just feel like giving up
and quiting school.
I wanna run away
and never come back.

RIGHT NOW.
Its possible.
I WANT TO DO IT.
NOW.

I need somebody to talk to.
and the best person i can
think of is SHEILA.
I dont know why BUT
HELP SHEILA!
If you actually
do read this.


In the years to come
Will you think about these moments that we shared
In the years to come
Are you gonna think it over
And how we lived each day with no regrets
Nothing lasts forever though we want it to
The road ahead holds different dreams for me and you

Sometimes goodbye though it hurts in your heart is the only way for destiny
Sometimes goodbye though it hurts is the only way now for you and me
Though its the hardest thing to say
I'll miss your love in every way
So say goodbye
But don't you cry
Cause true love never dies

I'll never forget you'll.
Sorry i have to do this.

posted by stacey @ Saturday, July 16, 2005